So, this topic’s
not new but it is fresh on my mind.
My closest friend
called me the other day a little upset after having just found out that her
nickname at work was “Elsa”.
Why? Because she
was considered as The Snow Queen and was regularly referred to as a “cold
bitch”.
I was upset for
her… at first.
Here’s the
thing:
Throughout
university she worked two jobs, looked after her mother who was sick at the
time and still managed to earn a First-Class Honours degree (equiv. 3.7-4.0).
In the past year
she's been promoted twice at her company for increasing brand engagement by a
whopping 34% and increasing sales by 26%.
She’s been
headhunted time and time again throughout her career and I happen to think she
has a heart of gold (but of course I would say that).
Anyway, after we
ended our call, it got me thinking about other conversations I’ve had.
My older sister,
who has turned around many underperforming branches at her job, has also been
called a "bitch" by her co-workers. My younger sister - only 14 - is
often called a “bossy girl” when she teaches dance at the weekend or a “bossy
bitch” for telling her friends not to bully other girls.
And then it got me
thinking about Hermione Granger (you know, Harry Potter’s best friend).
Now, for the
record, I’m a huge Harry Potter, J.K. Rowling and Emma Watson fan. But I can’t
help but want to ask J.K. Rowling, if she were to write the first Harry Potter
book again, would she still describe Hermione as having a “bossy sort of
voice”?
Or, if Hermione’s
character had been a boy, would she have used words like “brazen” or
“commanding” instead?
Again, I’m a huge
fan so please don’t mistake this as an attack on J.K. Rowling’s brilliant
writing. I’m simply curious.
Why? Globally,
women make up only 24% of senior business roles yet I hear “my boss is such a
bitch” far more than I ever hear “my boss is such an asshole.”
Would my friend be
called "Elsa" or a "cold bitch" if she were a guy? I doubt
it.
They’d say he’s “a
formidable leader” or “firm but fair” or “gets shit done”.
This isn't about
excusing bad behaviour - from women, men and others - and then calling it
"leadership". But far too often we vilify women for the exact same
qualities and behaviours that we praise men for.
It has to stop.
So, to all the
“Bitches” out there in the workplace who are killing it, if you hear this word
being used to describe you, I hope you hear the following instead:
BOLD
INTELLIGENT
TENACIOUS
CHAMPION
HERO
Because that's
likely what you'd be called if you were a guy.
Sam Struan,
(Proud brother to
two brazen sisters and best friend to a strong, formidable woman)


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